A thought to pen...

Wow...finally, i'm updating this wonderful blog of mine. it's been a long long while since i last made an input, due to negligiance and procrastination. Yupyup.. oh well, better late than never. Yeah?

time flew by, subconciously, leaving a track to trail.
there i was, stumbling on, an aching soul to fail
try as i may, with might or flight, it never stood still
slowly but surely, my heart to feel, my soul to heal

deep eh?? yeah~! i tot so too! came up with tis in a couple of minutes.

Yesh, time has passed me by so quickly, so fast. Been thru survival, graced a mountain peak, baptized in river, shed tears of joy, fought senselessly, heart flipped ceaselessly, with a rotting limb. frens missed, buddies lost, experience gained, and more to come.

Right now i've already graduated from my school and moved on to a new phase of military life. wow... got a choc bar, tasted it's power, yeah.. feels good but heavy. guess tat's the price to pay, on top of those downpayments for the last 10 months.

Coming back to a place of knowing God more. Praise and faith, making it possible. I'm hoping to contribute more to my cell, church and of coz Godly works. yeah~ things r in the pipeline... coming to past. :)

yeah~ just gotta hold on and enjoy the ride.

some say, you'll never know that you've lived until your existence has been inflicted by external forces.

how true...
I never knew how nice was it to be able to attend school everyday
I never knew how beautiful the HDBs looked at night
I never knew how tasty boiled potatoes tasted
I never knew how wonderful is it to sit around chatting with my grand parents even when obstacles like language and physical deafness stood their ground.
I never knew a lot of the minute things in life that i once took for granted, meant so much to me..

but there's something that's rather peculiar...

I thought I knew you mean a lot to me...
but i was wrong..

You simply mean too much to me... way too much...

Love ya lots bibi dear~!

weijian

yeah~! finally... i'm with Zarah~!

yupyup. Being with her brings me great joy. And i look forward to better years ahead with her till eternity.. hahahaz... mushy??? too bad if ya can't stand it.. :P

okidoki.. i think i'll get back to my bunk soon.

love ya all..

Weijian

hello blog..

Wow... how time flies.. come to think of it.. i've finally made it thru cadet life for so long n now i'm like left with 3 more months before all these ordeal will come to an end.. hopefully :P

right now training is more survival based and before we know it.. there will b a much slimmer me... after all the starving and foot movement over great distances... hahaz.. my final attempt at getting the abs i've never tot existed..

i wonder how's the blogs of my friends... never been able to view them.. coz i've reformatted my com.. yeahz.. so sad.. lost their add.. dumb virus attacked me com while i was away in training..

Kun gave me a very nice t-shirt.. designed by a great friend of mine.. weihao.. then there was this short but meaningful quote on the paper bag.. "whatever relationship that is built on God will never be lost." how it made me ponder bout the friendship between ben n i.. all the talk of brotherhood seems so fake.. am really tired of making the move to approach him, coz he's not helping it at all.. alwaise showing me a black face.. sacastic words..

but i'm gonna try again.. been praying about it.. to mend what was broken.. esp since Zac wants me to patch things with him. hopefully it's bcoz of the friendship that's why i'm doing it, n not solely bcoz of Zac.. else the friendship will be of no point at all..

tink i better go get busy wif me camp prep... gotta book in liaoz..

missya mr blog...

one of those emo moments :P...

Sitting around i idled and stared
at the pictures moving in thin air
flickled upon the walls of my mind
telling a story that made me cry

i'm a thinker and once again i'm flooded by my thoughts. some good some bad some just to take up brain time.

ouch.. my back's aching.. the training has been mighty torturous.. but it's good.. brings me closer to becoming a better soldier..

okie.. tink i better get some rest soon :P

cheerios
weijian

dear blog...

i'm going back to camp once again.. n i'll be having another out field event this coming week.. out fields are not really something that i'll look forward to, esp since i just came back from taiwan earlier tis week.. hmm.. wish i can just sit back n rest... stop all this training and be a civilian.. or at least a 8 to 5 military personnel...

oh well.. i'll just lift my head up and walk this officer grooming path.. Lamp unto my feet, Light unto my path.. trust that God is leading me on in this phase of my life..

just chill out and enjoy the ride~

love
weijian

I'm back~!

Training overseas has really been quite an experience. It gave me the chance to see several of life's issues n other aspects from a different viewpoints, also made me cherish what i have even more...

Hmm.. what a lot of thoughts flooded my mind. Tried to type on several occasions but held back fingers.. wondering if i typed tat then there's so many other events i would need to type... I guess talking to me in person would be the best.. hehehe.. yeah.. missed me? then come find me personally.. and find out what i've been thru during the last few weeks.

basically taiwan is cool if you dont look at the summer heat and mountain ranges. Oh not to forget what impression we left on the taiwanese ladies. Great looking dudes :P yupyup.

Soldiering on~

weijian

I'm surprise~! by the amount of viewership tis place has.. Seems like quite a few of my frens have chanced upon tis lil sauntuary of mine..it somewhat gives me this sense of intrusion.. but then again..touched in a sense, coz people care to read.

due to the overwhelming reader's response to the fainting incident, here's a lil behind the scene of what really happened tat caused me to concuss..

basically i've been training in the scorching sun with minimal shade for 2 days. then my body wasn't in very good shape already.. it was a pre-diarrhoea time, poor appetite coupled with intensive training kinda made my health worst. Then I just keep to the training schedule, didnt want to miss too much of the lessons. yupyup..

So when i finally got admitted, the IV needle kinda activated the fainting pocess. That's when i realized the cause is due to over-exhaustion and dehydration.

So to those of you who have been poking me in the sides n taunting me, i'm not weak hor.. :P

As for those genuinely concern, I'm doing fine liaoz.. yupyup

anyway today's the dae, when soldiers grow wings and fly.. i'll not be around until the 15th of june.. yupz.. so you guys juz enjoy yourselves n don't miss me too much hor~

Soldiering on
weijian

hmm.. i've tried to sleep in.. but can't really.. despite the fact i slept at 5am this morning.. i think my biological clock is set to waking up before the breaking of dawn... tis is bad for me body.. :P

Feels great to be sitting around.. feeling really relaxed.. n tinking of what to do next... something i used to take for granted during my pre-poly n poly years. Amazed at how mindsets are changed by the army..

okiez.. i better do something more productive.. else i'm gonna stab myself silly when i begin my mad rush juz before my flight..
yupyup.. u heard it rite.. i'm flying off to taiwan already... yeah~ for my first overseas training.. cool eh? will get to see loads of things and interact with loadsa people. yeah~!

but i'll miss home n the people around.. yupz.. u guys... oh well.. 3 weeks aint too long eh?

soldiering on~!

Here's a post dued last weekend...

Day: Tuesday
Time: 11;30am
Location: Medical centre

There i was.. sitting in the lab waiting to be IVed. The medic, a little feminine by expressions, was humming away some oldies. My friend, another sicken soldier, was there lying bside me as another medic prepares him for some kinda of electrical treatment. He smiled at me as my medic prepares to insert the needle into my vein. Before i know it, the needle was in and the pain that came along was somewhat within my threshold... i thought, all's gonna be fine soon. How wrong can i get...

Imagine my vison as a tv screen, the edges begun to fade away, slowly but surely, the darkness crept towards the centre of my view. Felt like someone was dimming the lights. My breathing became heavier, the medic stopped his humming, my friend started to shout out my name... before i knew it, i've lost control of my body and slumped onto the table next to me. Yes, I've lost conciousness and fainted.. the first time round... I recovered with about 4 medics around me and they decided to evacuate this weaken mortal to the sickbay. While on my way there.. bearly walking... i begun to slip into unconciousness again and was in a semi-concious state when i finally hit the bed. There i recounted of what went through my mind while i was in that terrible state. Thought of the people i love and felt compelled to live on... then it was there.. during my darkest moment, i cried to God, "Lord, I want to live on" Yup coz i dont know what may follow if i lose conciousness altogether... i've got reasons to live on.. dreams to achieve.. life cannot end just like that....

And so i pulled through...

Weijian

"I wish..."

these words are so easy to say.. yet it's like a cloud that does not hold any form or substance. A fantasy of sort, an illusion that paints a horizon that does not exist.

in my days in ocs, i've learnt that having the desire is but the thought, but what makes the distinction is when a physical action, a forward step is generated out of this mental work. I actually learnt this fact in church before, but what makes it differ from that of ocs is that a cadet's step is one on a steep slope.

hardened in a sense, yet i still have my soft dreams. i yearn for the days of my youth when houses were made of books, when whimpering works wonders and when care bears ferried me in their clouds.

i wished...

Life is a journey, don't travel blindly...

These words been my personal slogan of sort. Basically there's 2 parts to it. Life itself being a process/movement to a destination and the other is employing wisdom while i'm at the journey.

In my current context i got into some kind of a situation, which got me rather frustrated. The main problem was the lack of communication, thus the negative emotions being displayed. It got so bad that i almost wanted to shut myself from the rest of the world. Yupz... But I thank God for the people he placed in my life, people who really showed that they care. People like Calvin n Rouxin... haha.. of course n the one who caused it.. :P See lah.. mis-communication... or rather the lack of comms...

okidoki.. everything's fine now... i'm hoping for the best, Trusting God, n fighting on :)

Coz I'm a soldier :P

and a human too :)

Thanks for joining me in tis mini rollercoaster ride tat lasted more than a dae...
Cheers
Weijian

mORe thaN woRds
nICe soNg~

Saying 'I Love you' is not the words
I want to hear from you
It's not that I want you not to say
But if you only knew
How easy it would be to show me how you feel
More than words is all you have to do
To make it real then you wouldn't have to say
That you love me 'cuz I'd already know

What would you do if my heart was torn in two
More than words to show you feel
That your love for me is real
What would you say if I took those words away
Then you couldn't make things new
Just by saying I love you


More than words
Now that I've tried to talk to you
And make you understand all you have to do
is close your eyes and just reach out your hands

And touch me hold me close
Don't ever let me go
More than words is all I ever needed you to show
Then you wouldn't have to say
That you love me 'cause I already know

Please pardon my thoughts just for this once...

What's wrong..

When things are so superficial...
When thoughts never translate to words..

I don't want to care about what's going on with the rest of the world..
I don't want to know what they say..

Stop trying to hide the truth from me..
Stop being someone you are not...

The tears flows to wash the hurt
The tears dries to harden the heart
I'll keep on walking..
I'll keep pushing on..

Just that i'm not the same anymore...

Hahz... caught some prying eyes peeping into the contents of tis page eh??

oh well.. better take a good look while it's on a cheerful note... hehe...

i am gonna book in again.. but i am going in feeling refreshed, satisfied n a happier person. hahahz... i got my bdae present todae.. cool~! it's a 30gb nomad mp3 player!!!! wow... can challenge my couz 10gb ipod liao :P hehehehe

yeah.. e weekend was great.. am very happy.. i know tis is probably the best weekend i've had since daes of ocs.... got to do loads of things i've wanted.. got to spend quality time wif my loved ones, family, frens, grandparents, n of course my cell. suddenly i feel much closer to them already... muz b the tuition wif junhui.. :)

okidoki~ gtg liao~! tata!!! soldiering on!!!

weijian

Finally... beloved term break, i take comfort n slack... :P

am browsing Kun's webbie.. saw our band webbie.. P.U.S.H. yupyup..

Wow.. how time passed. Everything was like so happening for my band.. we met up regularly to practice.. rehearse n have our fav prata juz down the narrow lane... there was the radio interview.. talentime competition.. n outdoor performance... i had my bass, my band n my friends. Those were the days.. n i believe those will be the days to come..

Zech 4:6 "This is the word of the LORD to Zerubbabel:
"Not by might nor by power, but by My Spirit,'
Says the LORD of hosts.

Zac shared this with me.. yupyup.. very nice of her... to encourage me.. n i believe tis is so for my band... truly it's by God tat we got so far n only by God we will go even further.. :) I long for the dae when we can come together n make music once again.. it's uplifting :) perhaps it was the music.. perhaps it was the companionship of my beloved friends.. cherished moments :)

I am into my prof term already.. yeah.. it's like another phase in my OCS training... how time flies.. how much i've been thru... wow... it's amazing... words can't describe... perhaps my sweat can.. n maybe by the end of prof term.. when i commission, i guess only blood can spell out what I've been thru... to my fellow hornets(if any one of u happen to chance upon this page) let's do it together... :)

My buddy for Service term has been changed... he got posted to school of logistics..
that's where he requested for.. signed on... he is actually a very nice person.. initially he didnt seem to b very nice.. but i can testify that God has been working thru him to make things happen.. he is really a testimony. Juz like another of my platoon mate, Kelvin.. a total change God has made.. powerful... :)
Guess I'll be without a buddy for a while eh?? Oh God... send me a good buddy for the rest of my 23 weeks...

Got to spend some time with my dad today.. really nice.. fruitful times together... hehe.. i sure do hope that he feels the same way too :)

To be a soldier is like every little boy's dream... they look up to the men in green.. irregardless of their rank n appointment... i too was a little boy.. i tot these men are cool.. but i never saw the sufferings they went thru for our nation... now...i still look up to them.. juz that i dont want to go thru what they went thru...

okidoki.. that's about it... my rantling... hahahaz...

Love
Bobbly bob Weijian

Haha~!

Managed to sneak out for a while... yupyup... having a drag queen contest at the moment... superbly funny~! tat's y i wanna come here and share with you guys the first hand info about it~!

They've got us laughing our heads out n to think it's only half time~! they're superbly hilarious~!

Also today my wing commander talked made mention about this well-written annonymous composition... guess who wrote it? haha~! tat's me.. yupyup... i didnt knew that it was my article until he mentioned part of the title... n he said it in front of the whole wing!~ hehehe.... so happie... maybe i shd b a journalist? :P

Oh well.. the show has started.. guess it's time that i go back n render my support to Fiona n gang of platoon 3~! Chio bu~!

Love
Weijian

Hah~!

Here's the next time round.. unfortunately i dont really have much time to type much coz gotta book in after my church service... oh well... it's all for good ole benny boy :P

Life's pretty cool now.. things are nice... gonna have my long weekend next week.. prob start on wed.. rite till thru e weekends... yeah~!

There's so many things to do, so many things to get.. hmm.. so much so tat it makes what i have seems so little.. only God can do the impossible. N i need to see the impossible happening!

Time really flies... tomorrow i would be 21... it seems like all my past bdaes are so happening that seems to pale what i'm about to celebrate, my 21st bdae in camp... now.. how yucky can it get? prob worst.. coz i 've gotten friends who will b celebrating in Brunei's jungles~! hahahah...

Gotta go.. kinda flooded with thoughts for the mo.. perhaps it'll subside n all be forgotten over time...

okidoki... gotta go.. love all you people... hope i can do much more than juz say...

Agape
Weijian

Yup.. I'm back :o)

It's great to have this long weekend break. Really got a chance to relax and juz have a great time.

Then there was some emotional ride... oh well.. all's settled...

realized tat it's a time slot to write my blog. Coz it's never too good a feeling before booking in. then it'll affect my blog. A point to take note of.

oh well.. so sorry my dear readers... i'll try to write something nicer the next time round yeah?

:)

Yikes! I've had less than an hour of sleep only.. yupz.. now back in camp to serve the nation.. hhehehe... dun really have a choice... also feeling really sian... book in like even before the sun rose... can't attend church svc... hmm.. my only consolation is that i got to see it over the net.. yeah~! it was good. Can feel the presence of God. Guess it's coz i'm like so worn out mentally that there was a huge hunger for God to be around... could recognise a few people over the broadband... cool eh? oh well.. wished i could be there....

Anyway will be off to some out field training... will only b back on thurs noon... seems rather tough... but then again... i'll be stronger... with God's strength of course...

Rangers have this song... one part of it goes something like no one will know what they went thru.... i understand how they feel... somehow... :P

Anyway i'll b back... hear from me yeah? :)

cheers
Weijian