it says 3.44am on my com. I'm supposed to be watching the rolling credits of LOTR but somehow or rather i'm sitting in front of my com typing this blog.
Christmas night... planned to watch a movie with a dear fren of mine. She agreed, so it's like everything was in place until a call came in... sounded like she was having an argument with another of our fren.. had my reasons for wanting to give up my place to the other fren... coz at that point i fig it was the most ideal solution. i wanted to make everyone happie... gave a lame excuse.. which kinda didnt go down well wif her.. n when we met up with another bunch of frens they got a situation at hand and realized that my presence is needed at another place.. i chose to go.. i weight the odds, i calculated the risk, i know what i want for my frens. i want them safe. even when the journey there bit into my leg.. i held on.. coz i know i they r worth much more to me.. n i know and have been reassured that they do cherish me as much if not more. i promised to come back.. but it's furtile... i knew she cried.. but i was not there... wanted to be there for her... but she didnt want me to return... buddy.. wad buddy? guess the only buddy systems only works in camp... i'm just a flop in this issue. a complete one...
Sigh.. my Christmas seems spoilt... oh what a way to commemorate this day. Christ died to set us all free.. n yet i'm trapped in my own grieve.. Lord, pray Thee carry me thru... more than that... i pray for my friend's happiness...
Therefore i shall return the helm, chestplate, sword of courage... Just me and my steed, and we shall cross the planes... leaving my hurts behind.. Wat's left behind is a place replacable at the command of the king.
Damn.. hope we can talk... but then again.. how to?
Sigh... wad a way...
farewell my princess... afraid i wont be around for long... :|
God Bless
Weijian
Thursday, December 25, 2003
Saturday, December 13, 2003
Back... but from where?
where i deemed fit for my existance. I don't grace it, i just part take of wad's there to offer and in return i gave of myself.
Thought 1:
I was at cell group meeting recently.. then i felt God spoke to me. A Word in season. It was just the night before my posting result came out. God told me that He will not place me any-o-how, but in a place that will Glorify His name. I'm there to be a testimony and not a stumbling block, to the Christians n non-believers.
Felt really encouraged by it. thank God :)
Thought 2:
People around are like getting attached and getting all lovey dovey... expressing their affections in words n deeds. Then i did a reflection of myself.. y am i not i this fairytale state.. then it just struck me.. i'm not ready... i'm still at the friends stage.. friends with a lot of people.. people of the opposite gender as well. i'm still in the place of preparation for what is to come. I'm occupied with other passions n responsibilites that such relationships have to take a backseat. I enjoy the companionship of my friends. And i'm glad to be able to just bump into an old friend along the streets and have a hearty meal together in town.. yes.. friends aplenty.. but does it spells good fortune? there's alwaise a flip-side to a coin.. i've got close friends who feel that they are not important in my life.. because i'm alwaise with so many people.. yet i just want them to know how dear they r to me... aquaintances add firewood to a flame, but true friends rekindles the lost spark. when i'm down it's only those whom i'm close to will be there... they may not be all that cool, hip, trendy, flamboyant... but they are there to correct and reassure... there as pillars that i can really count on.. i count these few gems more precious than the stones on the shores. All you precious please know i cherish you guys a lot.
Thought 3:
Still remember the period of time before i enlisted... a few of my friends told me to excel in bmt. in response i told them to be proud of me no matter what becomes of me. Still remembering how badly i started with so many setbacks here n there, losing things, making mistakes wif official documentations. How i knelt on the corridor.. scrubbing wat seems impossible to remove kiwi stains on the tiles... how my buddy and i embraced different opinions and believes, argued n disagreed, and buddy system became a 1 man show.. Yes, that was how i begun.. and there was where God picked me up... I got excused from punishments for the mistakes.. my platoon makes an effort not to dirty the tiles..my corridor guys took initiative to clean... n a nice guy, Ronnie just help me with the plants... my buddy, another friend and 1 were seating together at 1 corner of the room.. chatting.. suppering and just appreciating the moment.. How my buddy told me that he is so proud of me; his buddy for getting platoon best... yes, so was i... happy that he shares my joy. God has really brought me thus far.. even to OCS...
Now that I've been posted to OCS, i'll still say the same thing to my friends, be proud of me, no matter what.. not because of what i acheived, rather because of who i am.
Lotsa Agape
Bobbly bob
PS: Stones under high heat and pressure also become gems. Never despise friendships of aquaintances, coz with trials n testing great friends do happen.. Cheers
where i deemed fit for my existance. I don't grace it, i just part take of wad's there to offer and in return i gave of myself.
Thought 1:
I was at cell group meeting recently.. then i felt God spoke to me. A Word in season. It was just the night before my posting result came out. God told me that He will not place me any-o-how, but in a place that will Glorify His name. I'm there to be a testimony and not a stumbling block, to the Christians n non-believers.
Felt really encouraged by it. thank God :)
Thought 2:
People around are like getting attached and getting all lovey dovey... expressing their affections in words n deeds. Then i did a reflection of myself.. y am i not i this fairytale state.. then it just struck me.. i'm not ready... i'm still at the friends stage.. friends with a lot of people.. people of the opposite gender as well. i'm still in the place of preparation for what is to come. I'm occupied with other passions n responsibilites that such relationships have to take a backseat. I enjoy the companionship of my friends. And i'm glad to be able to just bump into an old friend along the streets and have a hearty meal together in town.. yes.. friends aplenty.. but does it spells good fortune? there's alwaise a flip-side to a coin.. i've got close friends who feel that they are not important in my life.. because i'm alwaise with so many people.. yet i just want them to know how dear they r to me... aquaintances add firewood to a flame, but true friends rekindles the lost spark. when i'm down it's only those whom i'm close to will be there... they may not be all that cool, hip, trendy, flamboyant... but they are there to correct and reassure... there as pillars that i can really count on.. i count these few gems more precious than the stones on the shores. All you precious please know i cherish you guys a lot.
Thought 3:
Still remember the period of time before i enlisted... a few of my friends told me to excel in bmt. in response i told them to be proud of me no matter what becomes of me. Still remembering how badly i started with so many setbacks here n there, losing things, making mistakes wif official documentations. How i knelt on the corridor.. scrubbing wat seems impossible to remove kiwi stains on the tiles... how my buddy and i embraced different opinions and believes, argued n disagreed, and buddy system became a 1 man show.. Yes, that was how i begun.. and there was where God picked me up... I got excused from punishments for the mistakes.. my platoon makes an effort not to dirty the tiles..my corridor guys took initiative to clean... n a nice guy, Ronnie just help me with the plants... my buddy, another friend and 1 were seating together at 1 corner of the room.. chatting.. suppering and just appreciating the moment.. How my buddy told me that he is so proud of me; his buddy for getting platoon best... yes, so was i... happy that he shares my joy. God has really brought me thus far.. even to OCS...
Now that I've been posted to OCS, i'll still say the same thing to my friends, be proud of me, no matter what.. not because of what i acheived, rather because of who i am.
Lotsa Agape
Bobbly bob
PS: Stones under high heat and pressure also become gems. Never despise friendships of aquaintances, coz with trials n testing great friends do happen.. Cheers
Friday, December 12, 2003
Tuesday, December 09, 2003
Sigh.
I dont know how else to begin.
How many times do i need to let others down before i realize the unpleasant incurrance unto others?
What words may stumble in unconciousness
that comes trampling upon the hearts I love
I've got only this mortal self to blame
of one's hands wounded and stained
So please let me hide in my corner
that no man should see my tear
while the storm settles down
my scarred fingers will i count
I've wasted 1 whole dae sleeping as a result of my food poisoning. in the process people were let down.
Wonder would people accept my explanation for my disappearance?
Dear folks dun be too nice to me, i may not be able to recipocrate the kindness.
Somehow I really wish i can...
Oh well. gotta try harder.
Try not to read into wad i've written so far. yeah?
Bob
I dont know how else to begin.
How many times do i need to let others down before i realize the unpleasant incurrance unto others?
What words may stumble in unconciousness
that comes trampling upon the hearts I love
I've got only this mortal self to blame
of one's hands wounded and stained
So please let me hide in my corner
that no man should see my tear
while the storm settles down
my scarred fingers will i count
I've wasted 1 whole dae sleeping as a result of my food poisoning. in the process people were let down.
Wonder would people accept my explanation for my disappearance?
Dear folks dun be too nice to me, i may not be able to recipocrate the kindness.
Somehow I really wish i can...
Oh well. gotta try harder.
Try not to read into wad i've written so far. yeah?
Bob
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)